Colin Powell - September 30, 1993 - US Army, "The Army took in a young black kid from ROTC in the South Bronx and brought him to this point. OHH OHOH! cause for many years. Military retirement speeches should follow the guidelines of any effective speech. Thank you. Enjoy it!, I have never liked working. "Joy" by Martin Dejnicki This poem works as an affectionate farewell. his duty as God gave him the light to see that duty. . Mr. Gorbachev, open this gate! Gen. McKiernan Retirement Speech. A tank ran over a box of popcorn and killed two Kernals, As we stood in formation at the Pensacola Naval Air Station, our Flight Instructor said, All right! Without the bread and butter however those accomplishments could not exist. Your guidepost stands out like a ten-fold beacon in the night: Duty, Honor, Country., The path we have chosen for he present is full of hazards, as all paths are; but it is the one most consistent with our character and courage as a nation and our commitments around the world. Wow but how old are you? Alison, joined by her son, at her husband's recent retirement ceremony. from the planners to the soldiers on the field. If you have any questions get in contact with one of the team via the about page. As a leader, I learned that I need to be courageous enough to hold people accountable and to speak up when something is wrong. It rained last night and the rain leaked all over the tent. "How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.". Eat up! Mike Mullen - Military Retirement Speech. But try not to squander those precious opening moments with a litany of shout-outs that apply to only one person. [Easy] How to Clean Rust off of a Gun Without Damaging it? Some of the jokes on this list I first read and on their websites. It will be time to hear it for the comrades and the friendship.Nothing forges good friendship better than service in our forces. "Retirement is not a life without purpose; it is the ongoing purpose that provides meaningfulness.". . For instance, Take the simple phrase, "Secure the building." The Army will post guards around the place. Oh, my friend, that can't be! The river Po around you; the Alps behind hem you in.Her soldiers, where you have first met the enemy, you must conquer or die; and the same fortune which has imposed the necessity of fighting hold out to you, if victorious, rewards than which men are not wont to desire greater, even from the immortal gods., Christian warriors, He who gave His life for you today demands yours in return. I told the reporter, In fact, we use these missiles 365 days a year. Sample Military Speech: Military Change of Command Speech Title/s of honoured guest/s, fellow officers, comrades, It seems to me that the vital bits of life are sandwiched in between constant bouts of preparation. When a flight is proceeding incredibly well, something was forgotten. There must be no room in our ranks for whimperers and cowards, for panic-mongers and deserters. And one path we shall never choose, and that is the path of surrender or submission. The doctor asks him to touch his knee and. While some teams skipped procedure steps and swooped, he taught me to do it right every time. Soldier: No, SIR!. And may you find life after retirement a happy moment with endless sweet memories. Comment: A wonderful blend of humor and passion. That way I could get a vacation from seeing their faces and from their toxic leadership. I couldnt have asked for a better sister. There is No One I would rather have had by my side and I am so looking forward to having you by my side for the rest. Thank you very much Dan. Leaders like Lt Col Fowler and Captain Bergeron continually teach me what taking care of people and the mission is all about. One Hundred years I replied. 25. Dear Mom and Dad. Officer: Soldier, do you have change for a dollar? Finally Group 4 is all those whove heard were having two Select Accept to consent or Reject to decline non-essential cookies for this use. Rebecca will continue to practice her skills as a nurse, and I hope to land a job as a corporate learning and development manager. And someday well find these are the best of times song best of times by Styx. "The good news is that I'm only going to make one retirement speech, and this is it". Its funny we work all our lives and in many ways our retirement speech is the last thing we have to do. Funny Retirement Sayings. Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save Will Rogers, Autobiography, 1949. Your achievements made difference in the country and your life is precious to us; we salute your dedication and honesty. . It is just like every other day. On a Monday we dispatched to the field and performed whats called a missile installation. Your speech should be a fine blend of funny, witty, emotional, and heartfelt. flame of freedom, Dont be the leader people hope get I hope you enjoy it. Later in my career I began practicing emotional maturity in my daily interactions. In retirement speeches, Ladies and Gentlemen, I need to add, Retirement can be daunting and a bit scary. General Secretary Gorbachev, if you seek peace, if you seek prosperity for the Soviet Union and Easter Europe, if you seek liberalization: Come here to this gate! That is our policy., The issue is one of life or death for the Soviet State, for the peoples of the U.S.S.R. When the the Marine came back the Soldier nodded and thanked him for the drink, very pleased he pulled one over on the Marine. -E.E. Retirement has nothing to do with my age. Our nation and its armed forces remain the worlds foremost symbol of strength and hope and of freedom. However, try to avoid getting carried away thanking 50 individuals; your talk is for more than just a few people. You gripped me with, "Every day that they are on alert they are doing their job.". Next year I will have one. It is not merely for today, but for all time to come that we should perpetuate for our childrens children this great and free government, which we have enjoyed all our lives. - Funny Retirement Speech A priest was being honoured at his retirement dinner after 25 years in the parish. IT'S TRULY A GREAT DAY TO BE A SOLDIER. Say congratulations on retirement with our tips. Military Retirement Ceremony Address. The second group is distinguished servants of all nations So I do it three or four times a day." - Gene Perret Protocol requires, of course, that you acknowledge some VIPs as that is a tradition in military retirement speeches. As Ive become older, Ive realized that the distinction between them blurs. Keep your promises, even when things get messy, 2. The issue is whether the peoples of the Soviet Union shall remain free or fall into slavery . One of our readers, Ted, worked on the railways for 35 years and wanted some tips to write his speech, including some jokes and one liners. Acknowledge special people. I reply its not a matter of what Im going to do, its what Ive done. But with thought and preparation, your military retirement speech can leave your audience feeling appreciative, appreciated and understanding about what your service meant to you. - US Marine Corps, There are only two kinds of people that understand Marines: Marines and the enemy. ', Shall we allow our audacious enemies to violate with impunity the territory of the Republic? I bet there are a few funny stories that you have had over the years. God willing, that goal will be achieved., There is one sign the Soviets can make that would be unmistakable, that would advance dramatically the cause of freedom and peace. Mr. President, Mr. Vice President, Secretary Panetta, General Dempsey, distinguished guests, including some of my counterparts who -- from around the world that I've worked so hard with . I havent had time to write hardly anybody. That situation with my team was a defining moment in my career. Chi Chi Rodriguez. "A man is known by the company that keeps him on after retirement age" - Anon. I beg you to remember this, not merely for my sake, but for yours . Humorous Retirement Speech. Funny military jokes are a great way to bring some morale to our service people, so whip out a few of these military jokes at your next gathering of family or friends to get some guaranteed laughs. Well it is the day before Christmas. Dictionary . Every military branch thinks that theyre the best, the most important, and in their own way the hardest working. Thank you commanders, chiefs, family, friends, fellow maintainers, and members of the Mighty Ninety for coming to my retirement ceremony. [Answered]. The men and women of the Mighty 90th Missile Wing are the lifeblood who keep the heart of freedom steadily beating. Retirement is like coming home one day and telling your wife, honey, I'm home for good! 7. We are currently looking for former Marines to join the team who are interested in writing about tactical gear, survival gear, hiking supplies, etc. Congratulations. Top 100 American Speeches. A leading local politician, who was also a member of the congregation, was chosen to make the presentation and give a little leaving speech at the dinner. Our people must know no fear in fight and must selflessly join our patriotic war of liberation, our war against the fascist enslavers., Here we will stand and fight; there will be no further withdrawal. " Unknown, One of the serious problems in planning the fight against American doctrine is that the Americans do not read their manuals.- From a Soviet Junior Lt's Notebook, The object of war is not to die for your country; the object is to make the other bastard die for his. General George S. Patton. Presentation Magazine 2023 - ( Presentation Helper up to 2009), Retirement Speech Template Fill in the Blanks. I was a Missile Maintenance Team Chief in 2005. Although more sweet than funny, the poem is from the point of view of the coworker. 2) Old age, fragile bones, doctor visits, medical checkups and a weak bladder - are you still looking forward to retirement? Did You Hear About The Accident at the Army Base? Ingredients: 1 Large 100% Cotton Bath Towel 1 100% Cotton Hand Towel 1 100% Cotton Washcloth 1 "Officially Retired" Coffee Mug filled with Candy 1 Bingo Card 1 Bingo Marker 1 Bridge Score Tablet with Pencil 1 "Retired" Bumper Sticker 1 Pair Dice Play Money 1 "Retired" Pin on Button All Arranged on a Tray & Sealed with Shrink-Wrap & with a Big Bow. 2. You could then bring it forward in time to how things are today or a step along the way. Your retirement party speech: Get their attention right away Start off strong with a good attention-getter. He deviated slightly from our original text when he gave the speech but was happy with the all the . And besides, you can appreciate your military friend by using these quotes. Gen. William Thornson, Make it too tough for the enemy to get in and you can't get out. Unknown, Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake. Napoleon Bonaparte, Basic Flying Rules: Try to stay in the middle of the air. When asked, what are you going to do now? A military retirement speech focuses on a very special individual who put duty before self and safeguarded our freedoms. And thats it. groups. Funny Retirement Quotes. Also, thanks to SMSgt Garza, MSgt Ward, MSgt Tietjen, TSgts Jennifer and Sammy Mackeyfill, TSgt Murley, SSgt Canon, SrA Galicia, the men and women of the Vehicles and Equipment Section, the maintenance Honor Guard (who stepped in at the last minute when the base honor guard had another tasking), Chaplain McClelland, and to SrA Westmoreland for his rocking rendition of the National Anthem. Everyone else has a second-hand opinion. Awesome speech! Ive had a lot of moments in my career, (pointing at the sky). The average age of people living in our military retirement community is 85. Watch the time and don't get carried away. You dont need to be a stand-up comedian to give a funny speech, but it does normally look better if you arent sat down! General Stuck in the Mud American Army Soldier Yarn The Nutty Soldier American General Reinwald Tale Favourite Funny Military and Service Jokes Letter Home from Funny Army stories Read More Take care and Ill see you in a little over a month. Teach the world that a malediction attends those that violate the territory of the Great People. If we do meet again, why, we shall smile; If not, why then this parting was well made William Shakespeare. Although this particular speech is geared towards a teacher, you could easily rework it to make it suitable for anyone retiring, whether a CEO, waitress or mailman! We must live up to the standard they set: we must resist our enemies in any and every way, and try to leave ot those who come after us an Athens that is as great as ever., On the right and left two seas enclose you, without your possessing even a single ship for escape. Perplexed he said but then how did you manage to get so many years experience? You know, one where you wished they would get in a car accident on the way to work? An introduction joke could be to The good news is that Im only going to make one retirement speech, and this is it. And that includes many . These can be customised for your own purposes. This website is not affiliated with the United States Marine Corps, and the information on this website does not necessarily reflect the opinions of the Marine Corps as a whole. This summer my family and I plan to move to Atlanta, Georgia. 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