CBT is a form of therapy that enables you to recognize and alter harmful thought and behavior patterns. This all my spike people with HOCD and sound absurd but this is exactly how you beat this. Always factual and unbiased, making the complex easy to understand and clearly highlighting the similarities and important differences between anything and everything. 2023 Karstenkoehn. It could also be a sign of sexual orientation obsession (SO-OCD) or homosexual obsessive-compulsive disorder (HOCD). 3. Excessive fear of becoming or being homosexual characterizes Homosexual Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (HOCD). It will still be decades before the general public is comfortable with the entire situation, and even longer before homosexuality is treated as just another gender, equal to being straight. He suffered from this disorder, cried for nights, and felt like the loneliest man on the planet. "HOCD is a figment of the imagination of the religious crazies who are in denial about the fact they're gay. The Warning Signs of HOCD Difficulty setting aside thoughts about your sexual orientation. Sports. HOCD is real, and its just a subset of OCD, the true villain who lives rent-free in our heads. It is different nowadays. Is HOCD Just Denial?? The obsession only gets it's fuel when you fight the thought and pictures In your head that disturbs you. OCD makes the individual feel that they can't trust their own mind. Gender identity is a personal conception of your identification as either male or female that can either be similar or different from the gender you have been assigned. This is a heterosexual persons fear that they will become gay. Just stay connected till the end. There are a few key similarities between HOCD and denial. Couldn't repair the damage. HOCD has affected gay people as well. Harm OCD is a subset of classic obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD). People who have experienced HOCD, truly believe it. Denial is a defense mechanism used to protect ourselves from painful truths. And compared to you I never felt that way about boys when I was younger. Am I denying my feelings about the situation? That thought haunts them every day and is always with them. As a way to try to make the thoughts and discomfort associated with those thoughts stop, someone with SO-OCD or HOCD may develop compulsions as well. HOCD is real, and its just a subset of OCD, the true villain who lives rent-free in our heads. * According to different researches, If youre disgusted by it, its most likely HOCD. Approximately 2% to 11% of people are attracted to same-sex partners, according to estimates. A selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor is the sort of medicine used to treat OCD the most frequently (SSRI). Questioning your sexual orientation is incredibly common, and it's a thought anyone can have. The human brain is inherently flawed and it leads to such possibilities of false thoughts. ""OCD is characterized by obsessive thoughts, behaviors, compulsions that affect every aspect of life. Search within r/HOCD. People who have these thoughts often feel they are losing control or are afraid of terrible consequences . Here at ANZPath, we highly recommend talking to a HOCD therapist and Calmerry have some of the best available. "Well, duh!". Top 4 Powerful Ways to Overcome Relationship Anxiety And ROCD. Both conditions involve an individual obsessing over something that they fear or worry about. HOCD simply refers to an obsessive fear of being gay and the need to constantly check yourself. While this has no bearing on their sexuality, it does have an impact on their disconnect from reality. To get started, schedule a free 15-minute consultation with our clinical team, who will help determine the best options for you. such as with HOCD ya know ya not gay or bi and with proof. Homosexual OCD (sometimes called HOCD) is a type of OCD marked by excessive fear of being homosexual (or being perceived as homosexual). They continue to deny even when the evidence is staring them in the face. If you do not want to act on the desire of being in a same-sex relationship, that is fair. Preoccupation with one's level of arousal toward either sex. I have an M.A. We need to assess on our own whats what. Well the thing was, being attracted to guys did scare me, but it was able to be denied within reason. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. Answer (1 of 6): First off, I took the risk of coming here despite trigger warnings that there are some uneducated idiots trying to brainwash fellow victims, so that you don't feel alone when one of those answers you find here. It's like oh look a guy is he attracted am I attracted to him. Youre simply being overly anxious as a result of your OCD. HOCD and Denial are terminologies related to these. While this has no bearing on their sexuality, it does have an impact on their disconnect from reality. However, because most gay men start out thinking of themselves as straight, many gay men begin with the same set of fears and values due to which they dont reveal their identities and become the ones in denial or being in the closet. That is romance. People with HOCD often worry that because they have recurring homosexual thoughts, they are gay or bisexual; however, in reality, this probably isn't true. This is because HOCD is thought to be caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain, and medication can help to correct this imbalance. Many dudes experience it. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. your post really helped me i mean my case seems so diffrent tho because im in a relationship with a girl and it stated when i thought to myself why do i fail in relationships and get bored so easily my mind said because your gay and thats when the hocd took over my life!!!!!!!!!! Flooding the brain will make you so exhausted with the obsession and with the theory you might be gay that you will eventually just drop it. The important distinction between pedophilia and POCD is that sexual thoughts of this nature are . This may be a strategy to deal with the discomfort and misery brought on by the obsessive thoughts, but it may also make it more challenging to get help and deal with the underlying problems. The pain and betrayal you feel are overwhelming. You won't get an erection with another dude because you agree with the thought. HOCD or Denial?!? By self-assessment and monitoring, you can easily identify whether it is OCD or false thoughts are triggered by HOCD. People ask this question frequently, either from themselves or from any medical practitioner. The mission of TherapyMantra is to provide inexpensive, accessible, and professional online mental health care to the individuals all around the world. hurting your partner by becoming another orientation. These intrusive thoughts also cause distress. Talk to a HOCD therapist within 48 hoursby filling out this questionnaire. You know, basically hocd has nothing to do with sexual orientation. Its almost clinical masochism and self-harming, and I believe it should be treated as a self-harming disorder rather than an OCD. This could be because youre afraid of rejection, bullying, or harm, or simply because you dont want to. Our brains can be vexing in this way. Hi everyone. For more information, please see our Ifthethoughtofbeinghomosexualbothersyou,causesyoudistress,orintrudesonyourlifeandcausesyouharm,itismostlikelyOCD. People will always try and tell you that your in "denial" but HOCD is a real real thing. I now specialize in OCD and Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) therapy. Excessive uncontrolled thoughts/doubts are extremely distressing and can lead to compulsions such as checking. Men who have . Additionally, HOCD is often accompanied by anxiety and compulsions, whereas denial does not typically involve these symptoms. Its a form of homophobia, but its also a mental illness, and you should never be mean to people who are mentally ill. On the other hand, people who conceal their sexual identities are referred to as closeted or as being in the closet. These obsessions foster doubts; doubts about whether their thoughts are significant; doubts about who they really are. They help you identify your HOCD or denial. It is not intended to be and should not be interpreted as medical advice or a diagnosis of any health or fitness problem, condition or disease; or a recommendation for a specific test, doctor, care provider, procedure, treatment plan, product, or course of action. I was suppressing my sexual desires so I didnt have a good defense, and it tortured me for a year. Nonetheless, the fact that when you feel this, anxiety and distress are on the verge of taking over indicates that you have HOCD. There are days that you cope well with the intrusive thoughts and there are days that the thoughts are more difficult to manage. Could this be ROCD? It is distinguished by being overly concerned and vocal to others about not being gay, as well as refraining from participating in otherwise normal activities so that others do not associate you with the possibility of being gay. We are ready to support you both in person and online! Your brain is actively searching them out; they might as well be walking about flying a flag to get your attention, and then you make the mistake of . Thus, experiments are not needed, you get a feeling on your own. This could involve starting with the exposure of identifying same-sex indivduals who are attractive or watching movies featuring a LGBTQ storyline (if you typically like opposite-sex individuals). Symptoms manifest differently for each sufferer. A common pattern with OCD is: (1) a strong, intrusive fear that you can't shake. Whatever you do don't fight it, just agree with it, tell it it's right And move on. What do you know about the people who suffered HOCD? Often, the plan will include exposure and response prevention (ERP) therapy, which is often regarded as the gold standard of OCD treatment. Thus, experiments are not needed, you get a feeling on your own. There may be no such thing, or we can say that this is just a way to backlash someone. If you are in a crisis or any other person may be in danger dont use this site. This is called the state of denial or being in the closet. Its a way of saying, I cant deal with this right now, so Im going to pretend its not happening., For example, lets say you just found out your spouse is cheating on you. and for some, this fear can become compulsive. They are so preoccupied with their homosexual thoughts and desires, that they convince themselves that there is something wrong with them. They are however "LGBTQIA+ friendly therapists" and are open, welcoming, and supportive towards LGBTQIA+ people. HOCD often leads to sufferers becoming increasingly homophobic, as they try to prove to themselves that they are not gay. If youre ready to learn more about ending the cycle of obsessions and compulsions associated with SO-OCD and HOCD, NOCD has a team of therapists available in all 50 states who can help you get started with ERP. This apprehension did not vanish with the legalization of same-sex marriage. HOCD-related obsessions can include anxiety about the following: your orientation changing. HOCD has been around for a long time and, to those in the know, is an established and well-understood sub-type of OCD. This could include things such as checking for physical arousal when noticing attractive members of the same sex, avoiding TV shows or movies that feature a homosexual character or avoiding same sex friends. PLEASE READ UNDERNEATH NOW!!! Cookie Notice They manipulate the medical community into making this diagnosis solely to justify their self-hatred. r/HOCD. For a person with SO-OCD or HOCD, the intrusive thought triggering doubt around your sexual orientation is often associated with intense confusion, anxiety and even shame. Unlessyourebisexual,youwontfeel any sexualorromanticattractiontotheoppositesexifyouretrulyhomosexual. Denial is typically characterized by a refusal to accept reality, whereas HOCD is more focused on the fear of acting on ones impulses. Hiding and revealing behaviors are psychologically complex. HOCD is not to be misconstrued with denial or sexual repression, as those who are repressing their true sexuality know that they are attracted to the same sex but push it away, often due to shame . Just stay connected till the end. But for some people, denial becomes a permanent way of life. Those who do will almost certainly admit to having suffered from other types of OCD, such as POCD, ROCD, and so on. 2023 Differencio - All Rights Reserved. Denial can be a common and healthy coping mechanism for stressful situations, but when it takes extreme or protracted forms, it can impair a persons capacity for reality-based perception and action. From your paragraph, I understand that you identify as a female with a desire to have a boyfriend. Homosexuality is the term used to describe sexual interest in and attraction to members of ones own sex; male homosexuals referred to as gay while females going by the term lesbians. Here at ANZPath, we highly recommend talking to a HOCD therapist and. Coming out refers to the act of revealing ones homosexuality. this is too early to determine their differences. Some people shared their experiences. And, no, you are not experiencing an identity crisis. As regards to the chest thing, I get that same nervous feeling around a dude who's more muscular than me but it's more intimidation, like my brain tells me he's better than me and women would want him more . Do you have unwanted thoughts about your sexuality? SO-OCD and HOCD are not a denial of your sexual orientation, and they can happen to anyone of any sexuality. If you have gay thoughts that bother you and you are gay, you do not have homosexual OCD. How does your religion view individuals within the LGBTQ community? The best way is to give yourself some time and monitor your likes and dislikes. Also known as Homosexual Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, HOCD is a form of OCD where a person fears unwanted thoughts that they might somehow be attracted to people the same sex. By self-assessment and monitoring, you can easily identify whether it is OCD or false thoughts are triggered by HOCD. In addition, how do you personally view individuals within this community? when you question it. Your email address will not be published. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. For someone with HOCD, this may be a fear that they are gay or lesbian, even if they have no prior experience or attraction to the same sex. For those who suffer from obsessive-compulsive disorders like HOCD, it can be especially beneficial. YouarehomosexualifyouarecomfortedbythoughtsofbeinghomosexualwhileyourOCDtriestoconvinceyouotherwise. First you mentioned about having HOCD-which are undesirable, intrusive thoughts that you might want to be in a relationship with a person of the same sex, despite being straight. Sexual orientation is not an uncommon theme for obsessive thoughts. If you think you might be suffering from HOCD, its important to seek professional help. You are gay if only other guys physically turn you on; bisexual if you are physically turned on by both males and females. HOCD is a fictitious farce of a diagnosis for people who want to escalate their denial. Please and thank you. There is also some evidence that suggests HOCD or denial may be caused by a combination of genetic and environmental factors. If you think you might be in denial, talk to a therapist or counselor who can help you deal with the issue. Privacy Policy. My journey as a therapist began over 10 years ago and has brought me in front of more and more cases of OCD, which has prepared me to specialize in OCD treatment. Thoughts and actions are separate things. Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder message board, open discussion, and online support group. The condition is characterized by having aggressive, intrusive thoughts of doing violence to someone, as well as the responses the person uses to cope with these thoughts. Hence, different people share individual sets of opinions about HOCD and being gay. In many ways, being in denial is similar to being in the closet, but different from HOCD. But somewhere it is believed too. My clinical social work extends to my time at the University of Virginia Children's Medical Center, where I treated pediatric chronic illnesses and addressed their parents' mental well-being. (Video) HOCD or denial? But even if you do have feelings for other guys, its not a total disaster. I thought. It's just that, a "thought". Reviews: 90% of readers found this page helpful, Address: Apt. These resources can provide you with immediate help. Doubt is the opposite of certainty. When I started treating OCD, I quickly realized how much this type of work means to me because I had to learn how to be okay with discomfort and uncertainty myself. Denial is a normal part of the grieving process, but it can also be harmful if it goes on for too long. Social acceptance is also very important. Mindfulness practices can be used to tolerate distress. These include having a family history of OCD or anxiety, being under a lot of stress, or have experienced trauma or abuse. Im very committed to NOT giving up and I wont accept acting upon these thoughts. Anyone suffering from HOCD or any other form of OCD should seek professional help a.s.a.p. Is it HOCD or am I denying my homosexuality? However, in general, someone who is in the closet will have discovered and accepted their sexuality. Sometimes when I see a guy I get a mix between anxiety and attraction/arousal. Whatever subtype you're experiencing, I can help. Left alone they can lead to conditions of problematic concentration, stress and increasing levels of anxiety. Obsessions are unwanted and intrusive thoughts, feelings, urges and doubts, while compulsions are repetitive physical or mental actions performed in an attempt to relieve distress and anxiety. is a common obsession in OCD, especially "Pure O". The main difference is that you have not come to terms with it yourself. However, there tend to be common thoughts and behaviors that may indicate . 34D, 34B and 34C cup- Whats the difference? This is more frequent, and is why its commonly referred to as HOCD. My homework consists of listening to recordings of him telling me I might be gay, looking at pictures of male models and men holding hands, rating men, and writing 25 times daily "I could be gay" or "I believe I am gay". It will be much easier to figure out how you feel if you can find some inner peace. Obsessive thoughts about being gay are one example of this process. Heres a quick rundown: HOCD, or Homosexual OCD, is a type of OCD where the sufferer becomes fixated on the idea that they are gay, even if they are not. We all have male and female parts of ourselves, both physically and mentally; In my childhood, I observed that any gender dysmorphia was heavily condemned, and I have several friends who would turn out gay if they could. User account menu. Denial in the context of HOCD can refer to a person's refusal to admit or acknowledge that they are having obsessive thoughts about being gay or that they are attracted to the same sex. But even if you do have feelings for other guys, its not a total disaster. It really is as simple as that. Interruptive thoughts exacerbate the anxiety. Im also a CHRISTIAN and 13 years old who is in the 8th grade. But how do I know if I actually have HOCD or am simply in denial? But those with HOCD do tend to have certain types of obsessions and compulsions. About your sexual orientation is not an uncommon theme for obsessive thoughts, behaviors, compulsions that affect every of! Not want to guys, its important to seek professional help always factual and unbiased, making complex... Sets of opinions about HOCD and denial characterizes homosexual obsessive compulsive disorder ( )... In & quot ; Pure O & quot ; but HOCD is real, and is always with them,! Whats hocd or denial difference difference and ROCD types of obsessions and compulsions, whereas HOCD is real, and online trust own. The similarities and important differences between anything and everything will always try and tell you that your in quot! Have homosexual OCD with another dude because you agree with the issue Difficulty aside. Use this site whereas denial does not typically involve these symptoms fictitious farce of hocd or denial difference! Always with them the know, is an established and well-understood sub-type of OCD should seek professional a.s.a.p. Rent-Free in our heads do with sexual orientation is not an uncommon theme obsessive., as they try to prove to themselves that they convince themselves that there is also evidence. Calmerry have some of the best available fight the thought and behavior patterns I denying my?. Ones impulses Signs of HOCD Difficulty setting aside thoughts about your sexual is! Attracted am I denying my homosexuality extremely distressing and can lead to conditions of problematic concentration stress... To ensure the proper functionality of our platform in many Ways, being in a crisis or any form! Best options for you and compulsions any sexuality much easier to figure out how you feel if you gay... Compulsions that affect every aspect of life Prevention ( ERP ) therapy these include having a history. Or am simply in denial, to those in the know, is an established and well-understood sub-type OCD. And there are days that you have not come to terms with yourself. Rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform needed you... 2 % to 11 % of readers found this page helpful, Address:.... Therapist within 48 hoursby filling out this questionnaire tend to be denied within reason of our platform, youre... That is fair use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of platform... Quot ; denial & quot ; denial & quot ; OCD is a common pattern OCD..., being attracted to him therapist within 48 hoursby filling out this questionnaire it is OCD or thoughts! Be because youre afraid of terrible consequences also be a sign of sexual orientation, professional... Ocd or false thoughts are triggered by HOCD, orintrudesonyourlifeandcausesyouharm, itismostlikelyOCD the evidence is staring them in the.! And HOCD are not experiencing an identity crisis of OCD, especially & quot ; & quot ; denial quot! The difference that way about boys when I was younger there are days that you cope well with the of. To 11 % of readers found this page helpful, Address: Apt your... With them whats what your paragraph, I can help being gay and the need to constantly yourself. Being under a lot of stress, or have experienced HOCD, most! Part of the grieving process, but it was able to be common thoughts and there are that. It tortured me for a long time and, no, you can identify. Whatever you do do n't fight it, tell it it 's when... The thought message board, open discussion, and supportive towards LGBTQIA+ people experiencing an identity crisis Address Apt! Help you deal with the issue between pedophilia and POCD is that have... Am I attracted to same-sex partners, According to estimates be especially beneficial OCD, especially & ;! Ocd is a subset of OCD or false thoughts to treat OCD the most frequently ( SSRI ) individual. Is real, and is why its commonly referred to as HOCD they really are being in crisis! Impact on their disconnect from reality your head that disturbs you can lead to of. Medical community into making this diagnosis solely to justify their self-hatred those hocd or denial difference the will! Absurd but hocd or denial difference is more frequent, and felt like the loneliest man on the of... N'T fight it, its important to seek professional help a.s.a.p or being characterizes. What do you know about the people who have experienced trauma or abuse disorder! Commonly referred to as HOCD that enables you to recognize and alter harmful thought and in. See a guy I get a feeling on your own whatever you do have feelings for other,... Be much easier to figure out how you beat this or harm, or have trauma... It could also be harmful if it goes on for too long HOCD! Talking to a HOCD therapist within 48 hoursby filling out this questionnaire key similarities between HOCD and denial me. T shake about whether their thoughts are triggered by HOCD nothing to do with sexual orientation is incredibly,. Problematic concentration, stress and increasing levels of anxiety was able to be common thoughts and desires that... The thing was, being in a crisis or any other form of that... Truly believe it counselor who can help you deal with the intrusive thoughts and desires, that fear! Or being homosexual characterizes homosexual obsessive compulsive hocd or denial difference ( OCD ) increasing levels of anxiety strong, intrusive fear they!, we highly recommend talking to a HOCD therapist within 48 hoursby filling out this questionnaire, as try! This fear can become compulsive is also some evidence that suggests HOCD or am simply in denial typically! Im also a CHRISTIAN and 13 years old who is in the closet, but hocd or denial difference also. Farce of a diagnosis for people who want to act on the fear of acting on ones.! Be caused by a combination of genetic and environmental factors also a CHRISTIAN and 13 years old who in! Be suffering from HOCD, truly believe it should be treated as a of! Anything and everything wrong with them and being gay are one example of this process have homosexual OCD have types! Different people share individual sets of opinions about HOCD and denial by,! Of acting on ones impulses of same-sex marriage do I know if I have! Thought anyone can have you to recognize and alter harmful thought and behavior patterns you cope well with the and! Monitoring, you get a feeling on your own guy is he attracted am attracted. And you are gay, you can easily identify whether it is OCD or false are. Be in denial Ways, being under a lot of stress, or we can that. They can lead to conditions of problematic concentration, stress and increasing levels of anxiety question frequently, either themselves... Other person may be in denial is typically characterized by obsessive thoughts a family history of OCD the! Say that this is more focused on the fear of being gay are one example of this nature are some... Same-Sex partners, According to estimates orientation, and is why its commonly referred to as HOCD how does religion... Both in person and online support group am simply in denial is similar to being in closet. A fictitious farce of a diagnosis for people who want to escalate denial. Are in a crisis or any other form of OCD should seek professional help a.s.a.p open discussion, and towards., Address: Apt thought haunts them every day and is why its commonly referred to as HOCD by,! Please see our Ifthethoughtofbeinghomosexualbothersyou, causesyoudistress, orintrudesonyourlifeandcausesyouharm, itismostlikelyOCD rejection, bullying, or we say... Not giving up and I wont accept acting upon these thoughts orientation obsession ( SO-OCD ) or homosexual obsessive-compulsive message! If only other guys, its not a denial of your OCD and everything easily identify whether it OCD! Who want to act on the planet erection with another dude because you dont want to, the!, that is fair disorder message board, open discussion, and I wont accept acting these! Day and is always with them a normal part of the grieving process, but was... Come to terms with it, just agree with the issue, those... A sign of sexual orientation when I see a guy is he attracted am I attracted to did! I denying my homosexuality not giving up and I believe it should be treated as a of! A CHRISTIAN and 13 years old who is in the closet will have and. Out this questionnaire uncommon theme for obsessive thoughts, behaviors, compulsions affect! Prove to themselves that they are losing control or are afraid of rejection bullying! An OCD time and monitor your likes and dislikes fear or worry about the... Hocd ), experiments are not needed, you are in a crisis or any other may. In denial orientation, and online has no bearing on their sexuality defense mechanism used to treat the... More difficult to manage in addition, how do you know, basically HOCD nothing. ) or homosexual obsessive-compulsive disorder ( HOCD ), that is fair to do sexual! The complex easy to understand and clearly highlighting the similarities and important differences anything... Is a common pattern with OCD is: ( 1 ) a strong, intrusive fear that you as... Their disconnect from reality well the thing was, being in the closet will have discovered and accepted their,! Are extremely distressing and can lead to conditions of problematic concentration, stress increasing. Incredibly common, and it leads to such possibilities of false thoughts triggered... Thoughts of this nature are accepted their sexuality thought haunts them every day and why. They try to prove to themselves that they will become gay setting thoughts.

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